Well, it’s time for me to add a little more to my story.
As I said, when I left that job I was spiralling down that long dark whirlpool of despair. In the end I ended being able to get 6 months sickness benefits (govt assistance) to enable me to try to get back on my feet so to speak. In the end, one night I was spending some time with a good friend and after us talking for some time she was able to lead me back to the Lord Yeshua, my redeemer. As is His way more often than not, He used my very despair to get me to turn to Him. From that time things began to look up. I started to go to church and have some good fellowship. The unfortunate thing was that though the church I was going to had many well meaning brothers and sisters in the Lord, it was also a church that was and still is into the ‘hyper faith’ rubbish. You probably know what I mean – ‘name it and claim it’ etc etc. At that time some friends of mine, a married couple who are both friends and brother and sister in Christ whom I love dearly, were also going to the same church. The funny thing is that this same brother was living at the same place I live now before he became a Christian and got married and we had spoken from time to time when he was a caretaker here. So anyway I was going to this same church for a while, not realising that some of what they taught was poisonous heresy. At this same time my friends were realising that a lot of what they were receiving there was not feeding them, so they were literally crying out to the Lord asking Him to show them the truth – because they only wanted to know what His truth is. The prayers were answered. My friend describes looking for books at a local Christian bookshop one day and a particular book “The Seduction of Christianity” by Dave Hunt (www.thebereancall.org) practically leapt off the shelf at him. This and similar teachings by Jacob Prasch (www.moriel.org) on studying scripture with a view from the Hebrew perspective using Midrashic understanding of prophecy ended up convincing them that they had to ‘come out from among them’. As they were finding these things out they were passing along this same info and these same books to me and, like them I found I could not get enough of it. We did not accept it at face value. We did check out whether this lined up with scripture and found that it certainly did. For a time we all went to another church that was quite good in keeping to the scriptures, but in the end we have all of us ended up being not interested in churchianity and do not at present attend any formal gathering.
After turning to the Lord as my Saviour this time I have been astounded from time to time how the Lord has just shown me so many different evidences of His Lordship and confirmed to me in so many ways His truth as written in the Bible.
I was sitting here one day a few years ago reading the Bible and praying and worshipping the Lord, when I was suddenly enveloped in what I can only describe as a tremendous flow of the Lord’s love. It was not a feeling or even physical thing as far as I know. I find now I can’t describe it. It was just a tremendous knowing of His love. I would not be able to tell you how long I sat there. I just sat there, tears pouring down my face. I don’t tell this to many, but I know telling you my brothers and sisters out there that I’m not throwing precious pearls before swine. This is one of those things that I could not prove happened to me, but it was as real as anything you can touch physically. I have no idea why the Lord would do this for one person and not another. It doesn’t pay to try to figure out God’s reasons for doing or not doing a particular thing in a person’s life. He sees beginning from end and knows exactly what He’s doing, after all.
Well, at this time I will consider this testimony closed. When I remember things that may be encouraging to fellow Christians I will share them.